UVM 2004 Summer Classes

To: All enrolled UVM studentsFrom: Office of the RegistrarDear Students- The University of Vermont is offering seven new courses for Summer, 2004. All courses are available for sign up on the registrar’s home page as of April 1, 2004. The new course offerings are listed as follows:

5-10 Management of Change Examination of various methods used to manage change commonly found in pockets and purses. Curriculum focuses on variety of change management protocols including manual & mechanical sorting, denomination rolling, parking meter preparedness, charity relations, and public fountain interaction. Particular attention is given to penny control. Students must supply their own change for this course. Prerequisites: Basic Math or enrollment in a Political Sciences major. Hours: 3.

411 Cell Phone Statement Analysis Course aims to give students a basic understanding of how minute usage, rate allowance, home & roaming fees, day/night/weekend minutes, and variable rate locality surcharges are used interchangeably for the greater purposes of profiteering by wireless phone companies. Prerequisites: Abstract Algebra III, Differential Calculus, Ph.D. standing. Hours: 180 Minutes (daytime).

666 Introduction to Munitions and Explosives General overview of modern arms and weaponry. Topics include rigging of plastic explosives, variable grade gunpowder plugging, lead jacketing, high-velocity projectiles, and proper setting of tripwires. Mastery of course concepts to be demonstrated in actual field conditions. Prerequisites: Anger Management. Hours: 3

999 Options and Futures The University is not offering any options or futures to students at this time.

069 Applied Lovemaking Technique This popular course provides students with an interactive, hands on approach to contemporary lovemaking practices, with an emphasis on expression and duration. For fair balance, a female to male ratio is kept at 3:1, respectively. A passing grade is assigned to those students who successfully complete an end-of-semester oral exam. Hours: 3 plus one laboratory hour. Prerequisites: Yoga, Finger Painting.

000 Theory A practical course that explores modern theory, with an emphasis on its role in conceptual paradigms and contexts within modern society. Grades are based on final paper explaining the theoretical constructs of theory as it applies in a hypothetical abstraction. Prerequisites : enrollment in a Political Sciences major. Hours: TBA

90210 Fundamentals of the Black Market An overview of illicit goods transactions, extortion methodology, raqueteering, and ‘underground’ supply chains as they are used in today’s large U.S. corporation. Course concludes with the development of a suburban narcotics ring by students using concepts discussed in class. Prerequisites: Enrollment in an Organized Crime Syndicate or MBA standing.Hours: Long

Additional course offerings fulfilling the requirements of the Masters of Business Administration degree are listed on the reverse side of this page.