Spring Fashion On Campus

Springtime is here again, and like every year, it is the time for badder fashion. Why badder? Well, UVM fashion IS bad to start with, but with Spring comes a myriad of style offenses that just knock me out of my senses.Let’s start with the obvious. The FBB. Female Beer Belly. They’re everywhere, just waiting for the perfect moment to place themselves at a prime location. Like over your head when you’re riding the bus. You’re thinking happy thoughts (laaaa… laaaaa la la la) and wow! it’s there. A belly that better be kept unseen is jiggling inches away from your head, courtesy of the oblivious girl standing right above you and her round, jiggling stomach.Someone on facebook made the point that just like no one wants to see guy’s beer belly hanging out of their jeans, no one wants to see a girl’s either.Second. Please, please refrain from wearing all pastel colors from head to toe, whether it is a pink-to-purple pastel nightmare scale or a monotonous chewed gum pink blasphemy. That said, let’s move on to a new topic, the central argument to this letter. I would like to discuss a certain, never before seen, piece of shoewear I have been spotting quite often on Campus. These are plastic clogs that are oversized, of ugly colors and just plain ridiculous looking. They are everywhere, you have seen them. They have holes all over them and scream “Suburban, Unattractive Soccer Mom doing the Garden”. Please, do yourselves a favour and get some decent shoewear. Decent excludes chunky platform soles too. A nice pair of metallic or earth colored flats for the ladies, and some cool Havainas flip flops for the guys will do. Otherwise, add a pair of overalls and yellow gloves and voila, you have Gardener Chic, minus the chic part.Soledad Fernandez Whitechurch, Class of 2006