The University of Vermont's Independent Voice Since 1883

The Vermont Cynic

The University of Vermont's Independent Voice Since 1883

The Vermont Cynic

The University of Vermont's Independent Voice Since 1883

The Vermont Cynic

Converse 203 Thinks You Will Never Find True Love

Living on campus has been a real treat for me. First off I would like to comment on the wonderful people that make up our glorious student body. From what I have encountered, the U.V.M. student body is one big drug abuser.

People are too scared to be themselves so they drink, smoke, sniff, stick or suck whatever drug they get their hands on until their minds are so wildly twisted they can’t see straight. Now I’ve been drunk, and I’ve been high, but I’ve never seen such a sorry bunch of worthless people in my life.

If you’re wondering why I’m so descriptive of our fair student body read on! I haven’t slept since I moved here in Converse. From the first second it was loud and crazy. I don’t mind loud music, or people having fun, so this is no problem. After the first loud weekend of being up until 2 or 3 I thought that Sunday would be a good time to sleep…I was mistaken. Sunday there was a party and they kept me up, yelling, slamming door bla, bla, bla. I didn’t say anything because 12 drunks easily intimidate me.

Monday after class I came to my room and these same partiers were just getting up. The guy had his stereo so loud it rattled my tolerance level.

Obviously he is trying to attract exotic women. I’m a little pissed now because I have to leave, and go to the library to read my homework. When I get to the library it is absolutely quiet. It was like heaven, and I fell asleep face down into my books. I would sleep there forever if I didn’t have to leave for snoring too loud.

I’m back in my room and my neighbor’s music is still rattling away. I close my door, and put on headphones. I fall onto my cozy bed with a thwack. After two minuets of hearing Bach I hear “Ohhhhhhhhhhhh!!!” a loud nasally voice rips through my skull. “Ohhhhhhhhhh did you see that?! That’s what I’m talkin’ about!” I lift one side of my headphones, and ask myself what the hell is going on? The voice pierces my forehead “Fn run jack ass! Run! Run! Ohhhhhhhhh!” He’s playing a video game, and wants the entire world to know. Again this must be some kind of primal mating call.

I let the headphone slap back to my ear, and turn up my music. I can still hear a muffled “Ohhhhh”, but what the hell after all it’s the dorms and you can’t expect it to be perfectly quiet.

That night I was hoping to get some sleep after hours of homework. At 11:00 the fun started. For every night for three weeks the fun didn’t stop. Here I am three weeks of staying up to 2 or 3 in the morning because my neighbors are jackasses. I try to catch up in the afternoon after classes, but the never ceasing stereo of death pounding out explicit rap lyrics continues to rattle my sanity.

I have an 8:00 class on Tuesdays, and now it’s Monday night and I’m a little grouchy. The time is 2 in the morning and there are drunken people outside my door, outside my window, always outside. I didn’t call the police because I didn’t want them to get busted because I hate the police.

There are no RA’s in my building, and I didn’t know what to do. Next thing I know the drunks start puking in the bathroom. Then they start laughing and having a good ol’ time in the hallway not thinking about anybody else.

What would you do?

I still didn’t call the police because they would obviously get caught drinking and smokin’ Cheech. I did what I thought was best, and emailed Dan Fogel because I know that he is trying to “clean up” U.V.M. He emailed back and said go talk to Res life, so I did.

Res life didn’t help and it’s now 4 weeks of not sleeping and the party’s continue to get louder, bigger and longer. I’m going out of my mind, and starting to think about emailing again. But I wait and think that maybe they’ll settle down. Nope, the problem continues, and I’m going insane.

I emailed Fogel again, and he sends the boys a warning letter. That night I was called “Faggot, pussy, mommas boy, and queer.” I have gay friends and female friends, so I took offense.

It was yet another Monday night and a RA from a different building just happens to walk through my hall. She finds drunken people all over the hall, and she calls the Police. The Police come and find drugs and whatever. The boys get another warning or some small offense, something.

As soon as the cops leave they got loud again. They were so pissed that the cops busted them that they had to scream and yell until 4 in the morning how stupid the cop was. This was the first night that I called the Police. After listening to them complain about how they were done wrong I picked up the phone. The Police came but nothing happened.

Right now it’s 4:06AM February 20, and I’m writing this because I’ve done all I can do. I’ve gone to Fogel, the Police, Res life, and have got no help. They (the drunks) just continue to do what ever they want, and be however they want.

This isn’t just kids hanging out, these kids are loaded with booz and drugs and they are screaming, yelling and making all kinds are problems. Everyone that I’ve talked to thinks that it’s stupid of me to complain.

Tonight I called the Police because it was 2:30AM and they were drunk and yelling in the hall, yet again. When the cop left one of the kids came up to my door and said “F**k you 203, you f**king as***le, f**k you.” Well now my room number is 203, and I know that if he wasn’t drunk he wouldn’t have had the stupidity to say that, but he did, and I almost responded.

I’m moving off campus, but I still think it’s ridiculous that an academic institution is allowing this kind of behavior. These people are worthless jerks that should grow up, and get over the fact that they can’t just do what they want all the time. This is college okay, you’re supposed to be getting an education.

If you want to die from liver damage or lung cancer go do it at mommy’s house, because I’m never going to stop emailing, and I’m never going to stop calling the cops; I want my education. I want to get out of here and get on with my life. I don’t want to sit here and be called a “pussy” by some punk that can’t hold his liquor.

You guys are not cool. You guys will never find love (love doesn’t not equal having sex). You guys will never be happy. The macho selfish attitude doesn’t work. Life sucks I know, but don’t be a jerk just because your daddy ignored you, and stop messing with other people. Chill out and try to get some meaning in your lives.

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Converse 203 Thinks You Will Never Find True Love