As most of us have read the Cynic’s “evil lesbian” story, published on Oct. 1, I would like to share a different perspective from the queer community. 

I would like to preface, I am not in the Cynic or really affiliated with them. I might join in the future but at this moment, I do not feel the most welcomed due to the column being published. 

I do understand, for safety reasons, why the author was not published and the “victims” were also omitted, however, I do think the comments should be opened to the public. If you are sharing your opinion, then there is always going to be others that can voice theirs too.

This column was not only targeting people but also was inherently biphobic and fed into stereotypes. If there are concerns of attacks or negative opinions, maybe the column should have been proofread or not published to begin with. 

I digress, and would like to try to share a more positive view of queer love and that there are good sapphics and lesbians. 

To preface, I have had some issues landing my sexuality label; I have identified as queer since I was 16. For insight and lack of confusion, I will be using bisexual/lesbian/sapphic interchangeably for myself, however I do identify as queer. 

Sexuality and gender is so fluid and you honestly don’t need to be in any kind of binary. 

For starters, no lesbian is “evil.” By coining that term, there is more division being created in a community that is already facing hardships from outsiders that create such stereotypes. 

I have been called “an angry lesbian” and have been asked “who’s the man in the relationship?” By perpetuating these stereotypes, it doesn’t allow actual aspects of the community to be seen. 

While my family and friends like to joke that I am a “stereotypical Vermont Subaru-driving Birkenstock lesbian” —which for the record is pretty true—I am so much more than that traditional stereotype. 

My partner and I have been together for almost four years; we are lucky enough to both be at UVM and have felt much safer while being here compared to our hometown. We have both been able to explore our gender identities more and just about everyone on campus has welcomed us with open arms. 

When we saw the column coining some lesbians as “evil” we—as most people in the community—were very hurt. 

Just because you [the author] have not had the best experiences dating within the queer community, that does not represent the whole community, let alone give you the power to write such a targeted column that has underlying internalized homophobia as well as biphobia. 

While I am not in the dating sphere in the sense of hookup cultures or casual dating, and can’t relate to that, I will say most of these “failed” situations boil down to communication. 

Since I have been in a long-term relationship, there were times that it was a bit difficult, however relationships are not always going to be rainbows and sunshine all the time. My best advice for everyone out there is to communicate. 

Communication really goes a long way, and while nobody wants to do it, it’s so much easier to communicate to a partner, situationship or anything in between “hey this is going well” or “hey I actually think I’m not feeling it.” 

I also would like to briefly touch upon the underlying biphobia. As I mentioned earlier, gender and sexuality is so fluid, and now is the time that you can truly “find yourself.” Yes, a bit corny, however most people here are away from their families and UVM is also known for their gender-affirming healthcare as well. 

While the author had spoken about “evil” straight girls, I would like to take a step back and look at the whole picture. There are some “straight girls” that have never been able to explore their sexuality and might be questioning if they are or are not queer. 

There are also bisexual women that may have not been with a woman however they are still bisexual. There is absolutely no need to be assuming anyone’s sexuality or their journey discovering their sexuality. 

I have been the girl that was the “token straight”—I had repressed so many feelings and while my family was accepting, I was scared to come out. I have also been the “questioning bisexual” after being in a homoerotic friendship for some time. 

Needless to say, everyone’s journey is different, and not everyone is as comfortable with their sexuality as others. You truly don’t know what other people are going through, and at the end of the day communication and kindness is what is key in these situations. 

If you felt targeted by that column, I am deeply sorry: one person in the community does not represent it as a whole and I want you to know that you are so loved. 

I think the author needs to have some self reflection, as well as the Cynic team, because this was in no way satirical and did hurt many people in the community. 

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