The Vermont Cynic

Why the Birkenstock trend must finally end

Gabby Felitto

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They’re everywhere. I can’t escape them. Every turn I take, I see them. I even see them in my own house. Birkenstocks are driving me crazy.

I hate the chunky straps. I know everyone swears they’re comfortable, but those soles look painful. The cork board material isn’t that great either. They’re just so ugly.

What grinds my gears most about Birkenstocks is that feet are exposed. I think feet are one of the ugliest parts of our body, especially if they’re not taken care of properly, so I don’t look forward to seeing them everywhere.

I understand wearing them when it’s hot and muggy outside, but I absolutely don’t understand the numerous people I have seen around campus wearing Birkenstocks in cold and rainy weather.

I’ve seen people pair them with socks to attempt to keep their feet warm and dry, but socks can only do so much; feet will still get wet even if you wear socks with your Birks to keep them dry. Additionally, wet socks are really uncomfortable. Sneakers and boots are better alternatives because they keep your feet dry and warm instead.

The prices also range from about $30 to $300, according to the Birkenstock website.    They’re pretty expensive for shoes  with a “universally ugly” silhouette, according to a July 2013 Vogue article.

There are so many other shoes a person can spend their money on, like Doc Martens. Docs will keep people warm throughout the brutal winter months in Vermont and are weatherproof, unlike Birkenstocks, which should only be worn during the few months we have of summer.                                                            

While breaking in Birkenstocks may be easier than breaking in a pair of Doc Martens, the latter get really comfortable after  getting used to them. These boots are cuter since they’re edgy but simple, come in many patterns and don’t expose feet. 

I wear ugly shoes all the time with my dresses, but I will not succumb to Birkenstocks.

2 Comments

2 Responses to “Why the Birkenstock trend must finally end”

  1. Gina Mama on February 9th, 2019 9:08 am

    Gabby, Guess what….Birkenstock makes shoes, boots, and socks too! You may never get away from Birkenstock lovers. While I agree with you that socks should never be worn with open toe sandals, I disagree with you on Birkenstocks being “ugly”. I have a collection of exquisite Birkenstocks and their gorgeous leather uppers are like pieces of art. Please check my Instagram feed @ilovebirkenstocks or my Facebook Page “I Love Birkenstocks” or even my webpage, http://www.ilovebirkenstocks.com to learn more about how Birkenstocks can be beautiful. Please note, that I also have my share of Docs and I understand the comfort there as well. But, please note, the longer you wear Birkenstocks, the more comfortable they become. Just like Docs, Birks conform to your foot. Kindly, Gina Mama (personal blogger at ilovebirkenstocks.com)

  2. IrishMama on February 9th, 2019 12:17 pm

    1. Birkenstocks aren’t a trend. A shoe that has been around for over 100 years transcends trends.

    2. They are not only the most comfortable shoe, they are also the best for your feet. Not only for your feet, but the pain reduction in the rest of my body because I wear good shoes makes the price more than worth it.

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Why the Birkenstock trend must finally end