Does Your Long Distance Need Assistance?

Walking around campus as classes commence, it is hard not to pick up on the presence of new freshmen. As they hustle from class to class, desperately trying to maintain their cool, but failing to disguise their bewilderment, I can’t help but hark back to my own freshman days.

As I picture my life in Harris-Millis, in the throes of the greatest transition of my life, it suddenly dawns on me that I hated my freshman year. I was out of my element and feeling every punch that came my way. Upon this realization, and through the natural process of harking, I then ask myself why? What was it about my first year that created such disdain? Then it hit me all at once. I was involved in something that I assume many of our new freshmen are a part of as well: the long-distance relationship. This notorious relationship, comparable to Everest, has often been attempted. However, few have conquered.

Let me preface the rest of my column with two words of advice: GET OUT. In consenting to participate in this voluntary act of masochism, you are setting yourself up for misery. As one who dabbled in the LDR for her whole freshman year, I can tell you with great certainty that you will live a lonely life of yearning, jealousy and insatiable desire. As if that is not bad enough, your melancholy will build and build, and eventually morph into resentment towards your partner, which could manifest into a drive to meet someone new. While your significant other is in no way responsible for this, I can guarantee that you will put the blame on their shoulders.

While I am painting a picture of a state of constant sorrow, it should be mentioned that there are points of happiness. There will be occurrences when your lack of a workload will align with your partner’s and it will be possible for you to see each other. Or you might have a great phone call that could lead to a slightly sensual episode. I admit that instances like these restore your faith and make keeping up seem easy, but like the depression that follows a crazy night on ecstasy, your high will be followed by a low. You will come to terms with the fact that your weekend spent in a dorm room bed was not reality. It was a night on drugs followed by a Sunday morning with a promise of library time.

I’m sure that there are those of you who are reading this thinking, “But we’re different! My relationship is stronger than that! We’re in love!” While I have nothing but admiration for your optimism, don’t be swayed by the appearance of a strong relationship. There are very few relationships that can handle the stress of distance. However, if you do in fact decide to chance the weather and summit Everest, of course I will give you nothing but support and withhold my skepticism. But rather than risk exhaustion and maybe death, stay at base camp. Join those of us who watch the turmoil from a distance.