A stream of consciousness regarding today’s politics

Henry Mitchell

Ha! Trump called himself a “very stable genius” who is “like, really smart” on his twitter Jan. 6. What an egomaniac; he is totally not qualified to be president. Lemme just tweet at him the excerpt of “Fire and Fury” that says he eats cheeseburgers in bed. Now he will look stupid on Twitter.

Not that he needs me to make him look stupid; look at the whole “shithole” comment he made in the Oval Office Jan. 11. I shouldn’t be surprised that Trump wants Norwegians instead of Haitians, but having his son Eric cover up his racism by saying “he is the least racist person I know?” What a joke.

Oh that’s right, I should go see if Stephen Colbert said anything good on his show. Oh man, Stephen really made Trump look stupid with a cheeseburger joke too, nice. I’m glad someone famous is willing to take shots at him, maybe he’ll shut up if people make fun of him more.

Hmm, now people are calling him mentally ill. I guess that makes sense — I mean, I don’t see any problems with diagnosing someone with mental disabilities to get him kicked out of his job. It’s weird how psychologists have refrained from doing this since that Barry Goldwater guy, but I’m glad they started doing it again for Trump. Hello? Twenty-fifth Amendment anybody?

Who the hell is this Ronny Jackson guy and how can he be a doctor if he’s qualified Trump as “very stable?” I have no medical expertise, but even I can tell he’s bonkers. Seriously, I usually agree with experts, but I’m going to ignore Ronny because he’s clearly biased.

Oh well, at least we’re gonna take control of Congress in the midterm elections. We dominated with Doug Jones in Alabama, so now we’re gonna win everywhere else too because of how bad Republicans look.

That reminds me, I wonder if Trump’s ever gonna stop complaining about fake news. Can’t he admit it’s Fox News that’s lying to the public with fake news? Oh wait, he can’t, because they’re biased. Like, how do people not know that they’re being lied to? Conservatives really make me lose faith in humanity.

Luckily Oprah is running for president in 2020 — she is gonna save us all since her speech at the Golden Globes was amazing. I know that she has literally zero experience in politics, but she’s really smart and nice. I feel like there’s some other billionaire TV personality who recently ran for office, but I can’t remember who, or why that would be a bad idea. Oh well.

I guess I should go to bed now. If only everyone was as informed and level-headed as I am, then maybe there wouldn’t be so much polarization…